Adopting Kate has been one of the most amazing experiences of my life so far. With all that is wonderful about this, there have also been other areas of my life that have taken a back seat. The biggest part of my life that I have left terribly neglected has been my Quiet Time and Bible Study. There just does not seem to be enough time in my day with all the demands of parenting a teenager, two tweens and a two year old. I am stretched pretty thin.
When will I ever learn that the one thing I cannot afford to neglect is time with Him? Something tells me it is a life long lesson. I have been a member of my local Community Bible Study class for the past 2 1/2 years. I love it! My class is filled with women who are just as caring, loving and down right filled with the Spirit as they come! I adore this ministry. I adore SERVING in this ministry along side of some amazing, amazing women. I have learned so much in these past couple years. As I left to get Kate and now in the aftermath of being home, Bible Study has gone to the way side. I knew I was giving up leading my small group (sadness) but had every intention of pressing on with my weekly study and serving in Kate's class as she adjusts to life in the Children's Program. We have been attending alright. And Kate is loving her class and is feeling more comfortable with every passing week. But me? I have been an empty carcass showing up weekly helping to make Kate feel secure and help Kate's darling teacher not pull her hair out:) Not good.
This week I promised myself I was going to do the study. It was time to get back into the mix. Not because I wanted to have something to share in my small group during Leadership Counsel. Not to fulfill some "duty". Not to put a check in the spiritual box. But, to spend time with Him. To have HIM speak to me instead of ME shooting up little arrow prayers of help to Him.
Oh how I love Him! Do you know what this week's study was about? FORGIVENESS!!!! Hebrews 10:1-18. Seriously? Here I have been so focused on how I have been failing Him by ignoring Him with my lack of Quiet Time and Study and He simply responds with a resounding: "Your Forgiven My child". The Price has been paid. Your sins are no more. If fact, they are no longer even a thought! "And their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more". Hebrew 10:17
Through out my study the Holy Spirit brought to mind a lesson learned through studying Beth Moore's Believing God. It is something I have posted on my fridge to help me remember who I am and how GOD sees me even when I am frustrated with myself and do not see the same thing. In those moments I MUST remember and CHOOSE to believe that:
IN LOVE I AM...
BLESSED
CHOSEN
ADOPTED
ACCEPTED
REDEEMED
FORGIVEN
I'M BELIEVING GOD!!!
5 comments:
Such a great post...just what I needed to hear. Thanks!!
Jami--your China buddy :)
Sweet, sweet truths, my sister.
I am right there with you. I felt the same guilt after coming home with WP~ just not giving God the time that was His. I have really felt so much better all around since I have given Him the first fruits of the day. Not always consistent~ but try very hard. Thankful you shared your heart and I am right there with you. Blessing in the word sweet friend!!! XO
Oh, so true. And nothing feels quite as good as cracking open that book and letting the Words wash over you! So glad you are back with Him!
A great post...one that speaks to me as I too juggle 6 children and a wide age range. A good reminder to seek HIm first in all things.
Your daughter is adorable...we have been home 3 years and the time has passed so quickly!
We live in the Pensacola area, so let me know if you need anything before your move.
Blessings,
Christine
thefahys@gmail.com
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